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Julia McColgan

Ruin My Life Paperback – March 7 2025

by Julia E McColgan (Author)

739 ratings

4.3 on Goodreads

1,470 ratings

Book 1 of 1: Mangled Masterpieces

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REMY:
Six years ago,

I made the critical mistake of falling in love with my best friend. Even worse? He fell for me too.

But beautiful things are fleeting. The onset of my depression blinded me to the warning signs and when I needed him most, he vanished with only a cryptic note.

Now, as I finish college in the town we swore we’d escape, I’m finding myself more lost than ever. Trying to drown out the misery in my mind, I tag along to a party when the ghost of my past returns looking as haunted as me.

I can’t fall for Win Rhodes again.

I won’t survive it.

But he’s not giving me a choice.

WIN:

It should’ve been a wake-up call to move back home with my parents after failing out of college and getting discharged from rehab. But that would imply I have something to live for. Idiotically, I agree to attend a rager, either from boredom or an innate drive to sabotage my sobriety, I’m not sure. Though, all plans of nose-diving into my vices come to a screeching halt when I stumble across him.

My sunshine boy.

The very one I had to leave behind.

I think I’ve rediscovered my purpose: Make Remy Sullivan mine again.

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Book 1 of 1

Mangled Masterpieces
Print length

414 pages
Language

English
Publication date

March 7 2025
Dimensions

13.97 x 2.39 x 21.59 cm
ISBN-13

979-8307265192

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Popular Highlights in this book

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I’ll battle demons, temptations, fears and flaws for the rest of my life to prove nothing will take me from you again.
Highlighted by 268 Kindle readers
“I’ll never be able to take back the hurt I inflicted and that’s a burden I’ll carry with me until I’m in the dirt. But my feelings for you never went away. They never will. You are, and always will be, the best thing that ever happened to me.”
Highlighted by 211 Kindle readers
Love is a natural disaster, leaving irreparable damage in its wake.�� I’m just another casualty.�� Guess I’m a cynic after all.
Highlighted by 181 Kindle readers

Product details

ASIN ‏ : ‎ B0DTYDYNZ3
Publisher ‏ : ‎ Independently published
Publication date ‏ : ‎ March 7 2025
Language ‏ : ‎ English
Print length ‏ : ‎ 414 pages
ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 979-8307265192
Item weight ‏ : ‎ 612 g
Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 13.97 x 2.39 x 21.59 cm
Book 1 of 1 ‏ : ‎ Mangled Masterpieces
�鶹�� Rank: #192,805 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
- #1,309 in Bisexual Romance
- #1,643 in LGBTQ2S+ Fiction (Books)
- #5,289 in Gay Romance
Customer Reviews:
739 ratings

About the author

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Julia McColgan

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Julia McColgan lives in Florida with her husband and two dogs, Bandit and Clover. She has a Bachelors of Fine Arts from the University of Central Florida and is a massive advocate for mental health. If she’s not writing, she’s reading or snacking on something sweet. You can follow her on all socials for updates on her latest releases.

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Customer reviews

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Top reviews from Canada

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Angela Chung
Heartbreaking and swooning.
Reviewed in Canada on May 20, 2025
Verified Purchase

This will break your heart and soul to pieces for these poor boys and build it back up at the end. Anyone who deals with mental health will understand the depth of what Remy goes through and Win. Win had my heart from page 1 to the end. I don't think I stopped crying all day reading this entire book in one sitting.

Remy and Win struggle with their own demons and issues but Win was determined to win Remy back despite his own struggles being back in the town that ruined him. I'm happy they got their HEA. I don't have anything bad to say about the overall plot minus 1 maybe? Just a bit more on what happened with Remy and his struggles, the relationship with Win and his family, and the outcome to those AHOLES. It's not enough to deduct a star as the ending gives you enough closure. I just love deep details and wish it could have gone on for 100 pages more XD.

Please do check your trigger warnings as there are some heavy topics and triggers that can be hard for some readers.

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Spicy.reads.with.ninnine
Beautiful and haunting
Reviewed in Canada on May 12, 2025
I finished Ruin my life and it's going to be a book that stays with me for a long time. It was haunting and beautifully written with a very real storyline that so many people lives everyday. Addiction and mental illness are not easy and it’s wasn’t an easy read. Definitely check your triggers if you have any. 1000% will recommend for the rest of my life.

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Meghan H.
Oh Win 🥹🥹🥹
Reviewed in Canada on March 10, 2025
Verified Purchase
Win had my heart…. His protectiveness of sheltering Remy of all the bad…. Even if my breaking his heart to protect him… everything that happened to him…. My heart goes out to him so bad! Such a beautiful story and getting the dual timelines ❤️❤️ ugh my heart

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Robin T
Got me out of my reading funk
Reviewed in Canada on March 9, 2025
Verified Purchase
Wow.. so much angst,

So I thought i knew how this book would go.. typical second chance. Nope.. twisties and turns and I couldn't put it down. It was also nice and spicy, be aware this book does deal with heavy topics. Total 5/5

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�鶹�� Customer
Beautifully heartbreaking
Reviewed in Canada on March 7, 2025
Win and Remy will captivate your heart from the very first page. Broken souls, each masking their pain behind a carefully constructed facade—both seemingly have the world at their feet, only made better by meeting each other. Yet beneath these exteriors lies a painful truth: neither of them fully understands the depth of their own suffering.

Though I’m usually not a fan of dual timelines, in this case, it’s absolutely essential. There’s no other way to fully encapsulate the raw emotion each of these boys experiences. The agony they endure, the intensity of their bond—these elements would lose their power if told in isolation. The back-and-forth between Win and Remy weaves a complex tapestry of pain and hope, where each moment of despair, each fleeting moment of relief, is felt simultaneously in the reader’s chest.

This book is not for the faint of heart. It grapples with heavy, potentially triggering themes yet it is precisely this emotional depth that makes it so impactful. If you’ve ever been bullied, battled with depression or grappled with the sense of not being enough, you will quickly recognize the author captured these feelings and subsequent behaviors spot on. You’ll see yourself in both Win and Remy, you’ll recognize the weight of their struggles, the aching desire for something more, the quiet longing to be truly seen and loved, and the fierce desire to protect what you love from your pain. This is a story that burrows deep into your soul, an unrelenting emotional journey that stays with you long after the last page is turned. It is beautifully heartbreaking!

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Top reviews from other countries

Angelsbookvibes
Amazing.
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on July 16, 2025
Verified Purchase

Wow, I loved this so much it was heartbreaking, especially what Win went through & how he felt he couldn't tell anyone. But also Remy suffering so much from mental health struggles, but when they get back together, the care they take of each other is beautiful & Remy is amazing support for Win.
Remy & Win will live rent-free forever in my heart.
Make sure to read the content warnings.
I will definitely read more from Julia.

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TinyBookTok
Ruin My Life - Julia E. McColgan - Review
Reviewed in the United States on May 4, 2025
Verified Purchase
Some books entertain you, some make you think, and then there are the rare few that seep into your soul and refuse to let go. Ruin My Life by Julia E. McColgan is one of those books. It’s a beautifully written, emotionally raw, and deeply compelling story that explores love, pain, and the delicate dance between destruction and redemption.

From the very first page, I was completely immersed in the world of Remy & Win! These two characters are flawed yet achingly real, navigating their “relationship” that is both toxic and magnetic at the same time. Win’s journey is one of heartbreak and healing, and I couldn’t help but feel every ounce of his emotion. His story is piercing, making even the smallest moments feel significant once they are learned of what really happened.

What struck me the most about Ruin My Life is its honesty. This is not a fairytale romance, it’s a raw, messy, and beautifully painful look at what it means to love someone so deeply that they have the power to ruin you. It’s about losing yourself in the chaos of love, about the intoxicating highs and soul-crushing lows of a relationship that blurs the line between passion and destruction. But at its heart, it’s also a story of resilience. It’s about learning to rebuild, to find the strength to walk away or to fight for what’s worth saving. It’s about learning to find yourself again after losing too much and the resilience that comes with that journey.

There were moments I wanted to scream at the characters, moments I wanted to cry for them, and moments I held my breath, hoping they would make it out okay.

By the time I reached the final pages, I felt like I had lived through something profound. My heart ached, but in the best way possible. Ruin My Life is not just a story, it’s an experience. It’s a book that forces you to feel, to question, and to reflect on the nature of love and self-worth.

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Ami Wundy
Beautifully written, emotionally raw, and utterly captivating.
Reviewed in Australia on March 11, 2025
Verified Purchase
There are books that entertain you, books that make you feel, and then there are books like Ruin My Life the ones that reach into your soul and stay there long after you’ve finished. No words will ever be enough to capture how stunning this story is. It’s beautifully written, emotionally raw, and utterly captivating. From the first page, it pulls you into its world, weaving together sweetness, tragedy, wit, banter and hope in a way that feels deeply, achingly real.

This book handles mental health with such care and honesty, shining a light on the struggles that can feel too heavy to carry alone. Win and Rem are both misunderstood not broken, not in need of fixing, but simply in need of understanding. Win has spent so long battling his demons in silence that he no longer knows how to fight them in the light, while Remy, though more open in his struggles, knows exactly what it feels like to stand in the shadows.

It’s emotional. It’s heartbreaking. It’s numbing. And yet, it’s so incredibly beautiful.This book will shatter you like a scattered puzzle, only to gently, lovingly piece you back together each fragment finding its perfect place by the final page

And now, a moment of appreciation for Mitz the most delightfully sassy emotional support cat to ever exist in fiction. She is a voice of reason, a tiny, furry therapist, and, as all cats do, the ruler of her domain. But the best part? The way she adores Win, when she seemingly tolerates no one else. It’s a rare and precious thing, and let’s just say… Remy is not amused.

I cannot recommend this book enough. I’m a better person for reading it, and I will never stop talking about it. If you pick it up, be prepared it’s going to stay with you forever.

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Ashley Newton
Spicy MM Book
Reviewed in the United States on June 28, 2025
Verified Purchase
What a wild ride. Win and Remy went through some stuff! This was my first book by Julia and it did not disappoint! This spicy MM book had it all spice, plot, and emotional damage.

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Kellymg78
Heartbreaking in the best way
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on March 10, 2025
Verified Purchase
These boys, wow, these boys. Both having their own mental health battles but both being so so good for each other. Their story broke my heart, Win is just so scrumptious I wanna squish him & Remy is just a big ol cuddly bear.

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